'I used to have panic attacks': Carrie Underwood discusses the downside of her rise to fame as she vamps it up in vintage bathing suit for Marie Claire spread
By TESS EYRICH
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In the upcoming June issue of Marie Claire magazine, the blonde beauty opens up about her transformation into a country powerhouse as well as its accompanying struggles.
She confesses of her experience: 'At the beginning of my career, I used to have panic attacks. People were touching me, screaming -- it made me really nervous. In public, I just get nervous.
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Baring it all: Country singer Carrie Underwood chronicles her rise to stardom -- as well as fame's pitfalls -- in the June issue of Marie Claire magazine
'It’s a physical reaction, feeling like the walls are closing in. The fans are great. It’s not their fault. I don’t ever want to come across as ungrateful. But on my end, it is hard for me to process. Because I am still just me,' the 30-year-old hitmaker continues.
But as she poses in a vintage bathing suit and a floral sheath dress, the multiplatinum recording artist is quick to explain she always has been slightly resistant to social situations.
She describes her upbringing as having a substantial impact on her personality: 'I'm not a mushy person at all. We were never a huggy family. Or a ''let's talk it out'' family. Technically I have siblings but they are quite a bit older than me -- I was the accident -- so I have the only-child syndrome going on.
'I'm a little more selfish, a little more independent, a little closed. I do wish I were softer. I wish I were able to form relationships better. But hey, I mean...I'm not a sociopath,' she quips.
Her own biggest critic? Carrie admits of herself, 'I'm a little more selfish, a little more independent, a little closed. I do wish I were softer'
The six-time Grammy winner brightens while discussing her husband, Canadian ice hockey player Mike Fisher, whom she married in 2010.
She reveals of their playful relationship: 'My husband calls me the queen of awkward moments. Anything that can be made awkward, I will make it awkward.'
But though the couple has enjoyed a nearly three-year marriage, Carrie admits she still does not feel ready for children, relating: 'I don't feel old enough to have kids. I know I am mature. But being responsible for another human being?'
In fact, she waxes nostalgic about her own teenage years while revealing her high school yearbook quote.
Playful pair: The 30-year-old country singer, pictured with husband Mike Fisher in 2012, says of the ice hockey pro, 'My husband calls me the queen of awkward moments'
'You were supposed to say what you would be doing in 10 years, and I said, ''I will be rich, famous, and married to a hot guy.'' I guess I should have added a few more things,'' she laughs.
And the Oklahoma-born stunner's meteoric ascension seems to be just beginning.
Carrie -- who has appeared in cameo roles on both Smash and Glee -- will star in NBC's live three-hour broadcast of The Sound Of Music as Maria von Trapp in December.
She will perform at the 2013 CMT Music Awards in 2013, as well as replace Faith Hill in singing NBC's Sunday Night Football theme beginning in September.
The Two Black Cadillacs crooner said of the new gig: 'I think it's the perfect fit. I am such a sports fan and football fan, and we love Sunday nights around my household, so for me to be a part of it is something really special.'
The June issue of Marie Claire magazine will hit newsstands on May 21.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2324375/Carrie-Underwood-discusses-downside-rise-fame-vamps-vintage-bathing-suit-Marie-Claire-spread.html#ixzz2TJICLaLY
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