Sunday, 24 March 2013

The world according to Alesha Dixon

'My father almost had a heart attack when I joined Mis-Teeq': The world according to Alesha Dixon

PUBLISHED: 22:00, 23 March 2013 | UPDATED: 22:00, 23 March 2013

The Britain’s Got Talent judge on heartache, being too sensitive, and why she will do anything she can to rescue animals

'I've toughened up, but I'm still too sensitive. I tend to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders and have a heavy heart,' said Alesha Dixon

I don’t have to fake the chemistry on Britain’s Got Talent.

When David Walliams, Simon Cowell, Amanda Holden and I show up, we laugh all day. It’s been amazing. Amanda and I really hit it off; she’s incredibly witty. There’s a genuine camaraderie and chemistry between us.

I’ve toughened up, but I’m still too sensitive.

I tend to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders and have a heavy heart. I think that’s what can happen when you have a strong sense of compassion and empathy with other people. You can’t turn a blind eye and brush it under the carpet, regardless of how upsetting something is.

My dad almost had a heart attack when I joined Mis-Teeq.

I knew I was taking a risk by leaving university to graft away at getting into the music industry. Ever since I was a little girl I’ve had a vision of where I’m going and what I’m about. I knew I had to take a chance when I was approached by a talent scout about joining a girl band.

My dad Melvin, who’s an electrical engineer, wanted me to continue my teacher training, but I knew I had to follow my heart. It wasn’t a case of trying to prove him wrong; more a case of me being independent and not afraid to try.

I had no money for the first four or five years, during which we were working hard, writing, recording and developing as a group. Perseverance, determination and faith got me through, and luckily it paid off.

Growing up, I felt like I had no control over my life.

I felt helpless and frustrated when I saw my mum being abused (by her boyfriend; her parents split when she was young). I was only eight at the time.

When you see the person you love most in the world get hurt, it’s hard. I don’t remember living in harmony, I don’t remember any fun times, I suppose because the negativity has clouded it. I control everything now; I’m not dependent on people. It’s made me the driven person I am, always fighting for something better.

On Mis-Teeq: 'I had no money for the first four or five years, during which we were working hard, writing, recording and developing as a group'

Heartache takes you to a place you never felt was humanly possible.

I felt completely lost when the two things I cared about most were gone within two weeks of each other (in 2006, her record label dropped her and she discovered her husband, rapper MC Harvey, was cheating on her). However, being the rational sort of person I am, I can identify when I’m not in a good place and do my best to get out of that as quickly as possible.

In life you have two choices – you can stay down or you can get up stronger.

I always say it’s important to face things and learn from them. Life is never going to be smooth, and the true test of someone’s character is how they move on from the difficult times. Life’s just a series of chapters, and it’s all about moving forward and not carrying around baggage.

I didn’t grow up with a sense of security.

It’s something I’ve had to work on, and I believe now I’ve got to a point in my life where I would say I am fearless. I spent too many years worrying and being anxious. But I’ve learnt that regardless of what challenges you face, there’s no dark rain cloud the sun can’t break through.

The harder you work, the luckier you get.

I’ve never been one to expect results just because I think I deserve them. I work really, really hard, and the more I do, the more opportunities come my way. You create your own luck. My brain never stops ticking over with ideas. I’m bursting to come out with a new record, and I love being on stage; it’s where I feel most at home. The thing I love about my life is that every day is different, and that keeps me motivated. I get bored easily, so I always like to have a number of things on the go.

'I don't have to fake the chemistry on Britain's Got Talent. When David Walliams, Simon Cowell, Amanda Holden and I show up, we laugh all day... There's a genuine camaraderie and chemistry between us,' said Alesha

I’ve never felt the pressure to be a size zero.

I’ve never dieted or tried to lose weight. If anything, I need to work at keeping it on – but I love my food and red wine, so that’s all right. I don’t own any scales. I don’t mind what I weigh as long as I feel good.

If you think negatively, negative things will happen.

Things can blossom when you have a positive mindset and the right intentions. You have to be a careful observer and be proactive about changing your behaviour. As I’ve hit my thirties, I’ve been a lot better at snapping myself out of a dark place; much more than when I was a teenager and in my twenties.

I’ve always had a special bond with animals.

They were a constant presence in my life growing up. My heart breaks when I see the horrific treatment of animals around the world. I know a wonderful lady called Avis Lyons, who went to south-west India to set up the Animal Rescue Kerala sanctuary (ARK) and sold her house in Essex to cover the charity’s expenses. Sadly, Avis has cancer now, so I want to do everything possible to make sure her legacy continues.

I want to do everything I can to stop animal abuse.

I’ve been to Romania, where I’ve been working with another incredible woman who runs a bear sanctuary and dog-rescue centre. She has something like over 500 dogs, which is shocking. I want to sign every petition going. I think you can tell a lot about a person by how they interact with and treat animals.

Relax: the future will take care of itself.

That’s what I’d tell my teenage self. Enjoy the present, because you only get one chance to be young. There’s no point worrying about what might happen, because it probably won’t. Be positive and work hard.

‘Britain’s Got Talent’ returns next month on ITV1.

‘Teggy’s Tales’, co-authored by Dixon to raise funds for ARK, is available on Amazon. animalrescuekerala.org

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